As I believed it unwise to ignore this boisterous command, I obliged. I showered. It felt really nice.
Once out of the shower, the call to action started to reoccur as my alarm went off. I had not pushed the sleep and was unaware throughout the duration of my shower that it had been beeping incessantly.
My next few actions, as dictated by the seemingly instinctive commands that my head was wired to relay was to dry off, clothe myself, walk upstairs, and then eat breakfast.
It was only after I had finished this daily cycle that I started to think. I may have been conscious, but I had not conscious up until that point. I had not had an actual thought up until my first bite of oatmeal/yogurt and fruit medley.
Interestingly enough the thought was, I wonder who made this? - I realized a moment later that I had prepared it the night before, yet the inquiry was enough to trigger a shift to a more aware mode of existence.
From that point on in the day I was perplexed by the effects of my weariness, for an entire twenty minutes I had no thoughts that were not commands whatsoever. I allowed myself to become prey to routine.
This idea of unaware action brought me significant distress; never before had I realized so much could be done without reflection.
I realized how much of my day was devoid of this crystalline awareness that I seem to lose to the countless hours of studying at night.
Not only that but I started to see people acting as if they were not thinking: those repeating actions infinitely without pause, those passing in the hallway bumping into me and not looking to say they were sorry.
Exhaustion was master to a whole host of people!
I can only be concerned for what this mode of existence could possible implicate. What would happen if a ceasefire was called during a conflict, but because the soldiers fighting were under control of exhaustion, they could not interpret their commands to be a message, but only background noise?
How evident this is in other people's lives? If you experience this phenomena as well, please comment to tell me about it!
No comments:
Post a Comment